So...after writing my last entry...My dermatologist called me...late....after hours.. I knew what he was going to tell me was not going to be wonderful news... I braced for what was to follow. I mean it was a few days before Christmas.. I was certain he did not call all his patients to wish them "Happy Holidays".... I listened to his explanation of what was going on with my "freckle"... Lovely things that cover 95% of my body...the very things I had tried to remove with lemon juice as a preteen... Sadly, I must report, it does not work.. And.. until recently I had grown rather fond of them... until this call... (sigh) Apparently, the Melanoma I have, is a nasty little bugger... very invasive and loves to travel to other areas of the body rather quickly... Invasive as he stated... Something to be very concerned about he stated in his next breath... He recommended a FULL removal of the "tumor area"..and a biopsy of some lymph nodes... I shuddered at it being called that... the technical terms are not as lovely as..."naughty freckle"... :) Anyway... He was referring me to an Oncology Surgeon at Maine Med. and I would be seeing her immediately... I saw her 3 days after Christmas... she set me at ease... "You will be okay...I promise..." Big words to say...but...I believed her.. The surgery date was set for January 19th... We arrived at Maine Med. at 7am on a snowy, messy day... lovely ride to the Hospital I must say... Anywho.. I had a Neuroscan first off... WOW.... just WOW! Four needles which hold radioactive dye are shot under your skin..and by the way "This may burn a little"..... I mean it moves cells around and such to locate the nodes... so, I braced for the burning..."a little"... WHOA....it felt like my back was on fire.. and did I mention each needle is done individually.... YIKES! I white knuckled my way through that lovely 10 minutes.... and finally could breath... I was then taken to prep for surgery.. Did I mention I am a "freak of nature"...? You will understand soon... I have no veins... and what I do have like to play this game of called "watch what I can do...." ...where essentially as soon as a needle is put into one of my lovely little veins.. it collapses...poof...gone!! SO... getting and IV into my crazy veins is "almost" impossible... With my daughter I had about 6 IV's that kept drying up and well the last attempt was put in by the life flight crew.... with my son... it took 2 1/2 hours of pure happiness to get a line started ... you can see where I am going with this... :) We get in the room.. and the nurse, a very pleasant, happy lady, arrives to start an IV.... 1st attempt....floods and cannot get in...apparently, I have alot of scar tissue from past attempts.. IMAGINE IT!! 2nd attempt....collapses.... fun times..... 3rd attempt....much the same......(I pray to myself that the 4th attempt.....sticks) 4th attempt..."I am going to numb the area... I feel like I need to go deep to get this to stay..." numbing the area....does not ...NUMB the area...LOL but... after some deep digging she gets it to stay...(I will later notice on returning from surgery...my IV is now in the other hand...CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT??....hehehe ) AS I stated it was not the nurse's fault...but...my freakish body's fault.... I am given some "happy juice" and wheeled to surgery... I remember climbing from the bed to the OR table and then..........I woke up in recovery... 2 1/2 hours later... The tumor area was removed and rather deep..about a 4-5 inch incision....it is located on my back..and I also have an incision below my underarm area where the lymph node was removed... I am wheeled from recovery to a semi-private room with a curtain... This is at 11:30.... I will now mention my second freakish ability... I bleed... and I do not stop...and it has been an issue, pretty much my entire life.. I have had Doctors attribute this ability to the fact that I have red hair... not sure if this is fact or fiction... but.. it is what I have been told... I stayed in that room until 4:30...should have been able to leave after 2 hours....had I stopped bleeding I could have.. (sigh) ANYWAY... I did finally slow down .... stopped bleeding through my shirts yesterday... WOOHOOOO!!!! :) TMI ...I know.... So... back to my story... I came home and had wonderful people taking care of me... laid around bored outta my mind.....watched hours and hours of HGTV...BUT.. I have so many NEW ideas for Hubby to accomplish....(insert evil laugh here..) and then as my DR. promised I received a call late Monday with the results of my Lymph node Biopsy.....................................................................................................IT WAS CLEAN!!!! WOOHOOOO!!! NO CANCEROUS CELLS FOUND!!!...........................................................
I have been smiling since (well...except for the stabbing, annoying pain in my back...) I have been smiling a lot more!! I will still have the 6 month check-ups with my Dermatologist and I also plan to schedule a Mammogram to clear my mind totally... but... there are sunny days ahead .. for sure!!! Blessings to all who have held my hand during this heart-wrenching journey... I am forever grateful for the amazing husband, children, family and dear friends that have been here for me, as I have needed you all... My love to you all.... ~Stacy
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